Starting to do things right?

[1313]

I can say I wish any communications I had with my WW had been given a "time out" to reflect upon them. It's too easy to get caught up in the moment, and to react as more of a reflex.

That said, against DR I sent one email where I finally let my WW have it with both barrels. It did at least get her to pause and reflect. For almost a moment it seemed she might have come around.

But the A is a powerful thing. And, they want it to be. At least a drug addict might think "this is bad for me - I've got to clean up"! Heck, I even got a "I want to stop the D" message, and she told her L to stop it. Then, 24 hours later she said that wasn't what she meant at all. Yeah really, all it took was the OM coming over and talking to her. Made it all better.

That said, I will not communicate with my WW any longer. All I get now are "nice" civil type texts asking for this, that or the other thing. I'm sorry I even helped her the last time I did, as simple a thing that it was. No longer. She asked for a quicken books file this morning, I sent it with no subject line, no text.

If she needs anything else, let the OM figure it out for her.

PacLove, as far as sending that message regarding the R, I'd go through the DR one more time just to make sure that's where you want to go. Seems to me that you're pursuing, and letting her know your feelings. I don't get the sense you've had an "awakening", and a feeling things might be better without her.

Remember, you don't know who this person is. I thought I knew my WW after 35 years. Nope, not a bit. I listened to Sandi but really didn't hear her. I do now.

In my case IF the WW were to want to reconcile, I don't see how it would be possible. Unless she actually could admit that she needs to make a lot of changes. A lot. The person she is now wouldn't do that.

When I got the BD I was more than ready to admit it was all me, I'd be the one to change. Just take me back! Puleeeeze!

No longer. YMMV.