Starting to do things right?

[G8r]

In house or separate residences is a very tough question. My WW and I have been in house separated. I thought this was the way to go for a number of reasons, primarily she gets to see changes on a daily basis, I continue to see my D3 on a daily basis and I didn't want to commit to a 6 month or year lease for an apartment because our problems our solvable if WW was willing to try.

Reality has followed the script. Although WW sees the changes she uses them against me. For example, she says that I care about going to church more than I care about D3 because D3 cried for me not to leave one night. WW projects her anger on me and even says that my hello to her is snappy and mean.

Although I continue to see D3 on daily basis, WW turns that on me as well. Any time my D3 cries that she wants Daddy or misses Daddy, WW highlights how she is a martyr for trying to give me time with D3 because D3 needs it. She completely ignores the fact that she takes D3 away every other weekend and does stuff with D3 in her room to exclude me as factors in D3 reaction. My WW also says I spend less time with D3, mind you, my schedule has not changed nor has the time I spend with my D3. In fact, I spend much more quality time with D3 reading stories, playing, pretending and going to the play ground. In contrast, WW sits D3 in front of the TV while she talks on the computer.

Lastly, I didn't want to spend the money. I now think it would have been cheaper to rent than divorce. WW continues to say we have no hope for R without the separation. I tend to agree with her now. It is clear that we have no hope without a clear separation because her anger and resentment cloud all of her interactions with me. She absolutely refuses to let go of it and I don't see that happening with me around.

This has been my experience and why I regret the in house separation. However, I must add that this is a very personal decision and will be unique to each person's sitch.

I wish you wisdom to make the right choice for you and your family. Vaya con dios.