Ghostbusting This

[ATPeace]

Old thread http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2666891&page=10

So time is tick tick ticknig the days become weeks and the weeks become months and soon I will be hitting my year of hell.

I am still fighting letting go and have trouble moving forward but what I do know is that out of the average day 24 hrs I am not upset all the time, I find myself only getting emotional when I give my thoughts time when I move on from them then I do not find myself breaking down

So intamacy I am missing affection I am not looking for another relationship but I miss like crazy being hugged stroked kissed the closeness,of sleeping with someone laying next to them holding them feeling close to them perhaps,this is why when my children come to my bed I do not turn them away.

I can remember that my wife used to say that I was not very Internet and it was all about sex for me that this really was never the case.

I used to want strokes on my arm or my chest but she used to hate giving me this affection.

I used to like touch but I do not remember her ever really spending time showing this love to me.

Anyway ....moving on ....yesterday I had worked most of the day came home she gave me the toddler to play with and I said I wold make the evening meal I guess I am not great at multi tasking as she pointed out to me. My W was trying to get some rest as she is working nights.

I was trying to cook tidy and look after the toddler and was struggling to do everything she was offering no help and just said that she had to manage and that this is what I expected of her deep resentment from her to me and I am starting to feel resentment towards her perhaps this is payback from her to me.

I told her I am doing my best but clearly it is not good enough and tbh it never would be.

So how can I build intamacy when my W has firmly shut the door

Hugs

Ghost