(Terry Jones): I think she's dead.

[BrightFuture]

Hi Heather, I’ve been reading your updates. Congratulations on the offer of promotion! I hope you get it. You’ve done an amazing job getting to where you are now.

I really don’t know what tell you about your D21 though. I think most of the young adults experiment with pot at one time or another, just not everyone admits it. It is just a matter how much she is using. You said she admitted to using it every day. This is still not the end of the world. I know some people who did it for a while and then it got “old” and they stopped.

For your daughter this could be more than just experimenting, because of her Dad and everything that came with him smocking. I would be concerned too. But, what I also thought when I was reading your update is at 21 she is an adult. I think your xh didn’t have any contact with her before because she was reminding him of his responsibilities. He didn’t want to have these responsibilities. Now, she is grown up, so he feels that he is not responsible for her, but she is his daughter, and naturally he wants to bond with her. I don’t know if I’m expressing this good enough. It is like with my H. He never wanted the kids on his own, he did his best raising my son. He imposed the restrictions on certain behavior when my son was a teenager, including the drinking. But now, he has no problems hanging at the bar and drinking beers with my son. Still a little guarded, but this is just my H (deep in MLC, etc.)

I’m not sure if I’m making any sense here. Heather, I completely understand your concern for your D21, given the history. I also understand you stepping back and letting your D21 to make her own choices. I hope your daughter figures it out. After all, she has great example in her Mom.