Life's a Dance-One Step Forward and Two Steps Back

[melweb]

Thanks for jumping over here to see me Tx. I know you are a fan of blowing up the fence so the fence is no longer even a choice. And I tell you... I am thisclose. I am not even sure her H knows. What has stopped me? 1) I am NOT good with confrontation at all. 2) H keeps hopping over the fence and claiming he is not ready to give up on us, he has cut contact with her 3)I fear it will not pave the way for reconciliation.

I do know I want/need to do SOMETHING to stop this back and forth crap! Its making me crazy!!

Cil--"Upbeat, cheerful, busy, eye contact, fun"--all on my to- do list this week. Also figuring how to stop his dang back and forth, like I just said to Tx. Thinking my 180 to this is: "Go"--its not what I want so I hesitate to say the words.

As far as the "controlled separation," I do not understand it either. Thought someone here might. As I was googling for info on 'separations', it came up as a choice. I guess its a thing, but maybe not pertinent in an MLC case as they are just whack jobs.

No I do NOT want to see anybody else, but I do not want this separation to be his "free pass" to OW either. Then when it fizzles out or she doesn't leave her H, he comes back to me and says "Ok--lets work on this M cuz I am done my A now" So yes--neither of us sees anybody else until x time is over. Maybe this a question for my L this week.