my wife is a waw! trying everything to save it!

[anime92]

Every day I have been going though a cycle of some anger depression happiness fear and hope. How is one to manage? I have an appointment with a tattoo artist for an apprenticeship. Trying to re-engage my inner artist again. I am bottling my beer tonight. But still I am not seeing anything as my ultimate happiness goal. I will continue to strive into my GAL plans. I am putting a lot of thought into this theme park adventure coming up I have to make sure I, if nothing less, "act as if" I am really enjoying every part of the day. Any thought or suggestions as far as how to suppress any negative outburst or keep them off my face?

[SH_]

Hey anime92,

I am right there with you. The emotional roller coaster is quite the beast. Right now as I am in the same boat with the same challenge, I am basically taking it one minute one hour one day at a time.

My goal is to stay focused on finding the happiness goal and that may take some time, but I believe persistence is the key. As I find small things that start to balance out the roller coaster, I am documenting it so I can look back at it when the emotional swings start taking a mind of their own. With time I hope they add up so that I can fill the day with some consistency and emotion control.

That's just my current approach, but I'll try and share updates as I find more concrete ways to keep the coaster on a flat and more importantly, happy track😊

[anime92]

Thank you sadhub I have been meaning to read through your thread, but It is intimidating due to the length. It seems all I do these days is read. DB DR 5 love languages-I recomend fighting for your marriage others threads and all the homework re reading and trying to absorb everything I am overwhelmed. Ahhhh. I am going to read through your thread soon though

[PacLove]

Thank you paclove on question what are you referring to when you say "I gave up s"

I meant to say $... I guess it all depends on the type of work you do, my job requires a lot of self-initiative, thinking and strategy so it's very easy to let the mind wander. I do find when I have hands on work to do however it's a great distraction.

I too enjoy looking at all the family photos, I was even perusing our Facebook memories today - these make it tough though to GAL.

[anime92]

You are absolutely right paclove it makes it very tough to GAL not to mention that it makes it tough to GAL when you are watching your life fall apart

[SH_]

Hi anime92,

I think feeling overwhelmed is a normal feeling now. Our worlds have been turned upside down and inside out. I think we are reading everything in search of an answer. A wise young person gave me some advice as I shared my feelings of turmoil yesterday, that maybe I should take sometime and stop reading and seeking the answer from other sources and that I should take some time to look within and use meditation, self reflection and prayer. They said that the answer is within me and I can take better actions, make and follow through on better decisions and trust in myself if I would take the time to do so.

Basically there may be too much info and too many opinions to actually benefit us, and when we trust ourselves, we can act with better intention and more confidently. A confident man is definitely more attractive to our spouse, or anyone for that matter.

Just some good advice and IMHO this is the best advice I have heard of late.

My prayers and hope go out to you and all in our situations

[anime92]

Sadhub this sounds like good advice. I will try this. I have noticed recently when left with my own thoughts I go dark, maybe there is a point at which you can break past the darkness. I have also noticed that I have come to many revelations in my behavior through all the reading and contemplation I have been doing. I guess the only thing is I need not let the darkness fall upon me

[anime92]

My thoughts are with everyone as well.

[SH_]

anime92, My friend that darkness is called "Fear" We fear the past because it led us to our situation, we fear the future because we don't want to repeat the past, and we lose focus on the present moment. The present is the moment that we get to make a different decision. Use the lesson in DR about cheeseless tunnels. That can simplify your decision to act. You still may go down a tunnel without cheese, just don't continue to go back hoping to find it once you establish it is not there.

I know what you mean by "the darkness", as that was the same response I had when I was challenged to look within. This was the quote that was shared with me in response.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” ~ Marianne Williamson


Take the time to fight through the darkness. That is where you will find your light and then you will gather the strength to complete this journey.

[SH_]

I also would encourage that you Google Fear and motivation for it. There are a lot of good things out there to overcome the darkness/Fear.

FEAR- False Evidence Appearing Real.