Good mantra, Claire. And MB is absolutely right that it won't get easier.
Have a nice chat with yourself. Reinforce that mantra. Just because he says he is reasonable does not mean he is. Just because his narrative puts you in a negative light doesn't mean you are a biatch. You're the one who's the primary caregiver for your daughter, and you are in the driver's seat.
And I forgot that we also stuck to summer plans the first week in April. LOL, here we are, and I have no idea what our summer plans are.
Anyway, since it is really tough to talk to your XH, I'd probably stick to e-mailing. A work neighbor of mine uses google calendar to share with her XH. I think that's a super idea! Maybe you could create one, and map out your proposed weekends and all your D's appointments and special dates and take it from there? Maybe electronic scheduling would remove his narrative from the equation? I'm not saying you need to avoid the narrative, but I can only imagine that it throws you off your game. I suspect he knows it, too.
Jk, welcome. I would encourage you to foster your kiddo's R with her dad as well. It's important that they feel connected to both of you. I promise you, down the road, it will come back to you, so make it a good path for her. I know you miss her, but use your time to devote to things that recharge your batteries and fulfill your growth. That will also help your R with her down the road.
As someone told me early on here, no one wants to have a martyr in their house. LOL, I think it went like this: Get down from the cross! We need the wood!
Take care- Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
