I am content, that is a blessing.......

[Sotto]

Hi MLeigh, I identify with where you're at and you've had some good advice already. For me in a way it has been a blessing that H filed and has been keen to progress with the D. Although I didn't want a D, the decision was taken from me and I feel at peace with that aspect. Had H not filed, I would have needed to take some steps to stabilise finances etc.

I think Cali's point - what will change for me? - is a good one. For me, I decided not to consider dating until at least a year after D anyway so I guess the door remains open a tiny crack until then. Like you, I can not imagine being in love with H again. But I also try and take on board the whole MLC picture and appreciate that he isn't himself just now.

I can imagine feeling different if he approached me and seemed to have progressed in some way, but that hasn't happened thus far and may or may not happen at some point in the future and I just tell myself I'll cross that bridge if that ever happened.

Can I ask - is there an option for you to consider a more long term but lesser step than D? Perhaps formalising separation arrangements? Of course you'll decide whatever is the right path for you and I'm just throwing that into the mix really.

The straws thing is funny. Whilst he is where he's at, he clearly wants to maintain a link with you.

Take care xx