Thank you PT. I hope you have a peaceful weekend, as well.
At bomb drop, H told me with an angry firmness that we were done and said the cliched, ILYBINILWY. When I got upset he seemed a bit taken aback. Later in our conversation, and in many other "talks", he told me he thought when he said we were done that I would "jump for joy" because that's what I had wanted.
Recently, after our first mediation, I told him I would not be doing something because he had chosen to leave our marriage. He brought up that I left the marriage first. I remember saying "I have never left the marriage and my actions show that if you could ever take the time to look". His only comeback to that? A much quieter, "you left first". Probably not great DBing on my part, but a truth dart.
He really has changed the history in his head. They all seem to.
From what my H has said, he hasn't talked to anyone about his reasons for leaving and filing. Not even his parents. He said no one has asked him, either. They are being "respectful". He has only told a few people that are family or employees that it is happening. Of course, some of those people have told others. I've been pretty open with people I know. But I don't bad mouth him..
Its almost like he is being a martyr in his mind. "I don't really want this, she does. This will make her happier, she just doesn't realize it yet." But if you don't talk about things with someone (besides the person you've left), you can't get out of your own head. He is stuck. I wonder if he will ever get unstuck?
M-51 H-54 2D-27 and 25 M-26 yrs Bombshell and IHS 7-29-15 He moved out 10-3-15 D filed 1-27-16 D final 10-27-16
