Just found out 3 weeks ago - happy valentines day!

[Stormchaser]

I wanted to update this thread with some bad news/good news.

I'll start off with the bad news. I had installed a VAR in her car and listened in on her phone conversations. Everything was on the up and up until one day I heard her say "there's NO WAY I can tell hubby everything. He'll be destroyed. I need to leave it where its at". So, basically a lot more went on than she initially said. Initially, she was like "there was heavy petting, but when it came to intercourse, I couldn't pull the trigger". So either she had full blown sex or other things happened that she is scared to tell me.

And at this point, I'm not sure I even want to know. I just hate having that doubt now. I've since stopped listening in on her, for fear that it all may be revealed and the reconciliation we're doing will be damaged beyond repair.

The GOOD news: She's still incredibly remorseful and has shown me a massive amount of attention. The last VAR recording showed the OM still making passes at her, and her saying that she's put up her hands and told him to back off. A part of me wants to reveal it all to his wife, but she may come in and start something and that also may derail the reconciliation. Wife and I had a getaway weekend and it all went well except for one blowout, and the MC said this was normal.

Wife finally admitted ILY and keeps saying it. Said she will quit the job if I really pressed it. Has been incredibly sexual and receiving of my advances. I have my bad days, such as wondering if he was doing that or this to her, but I have to learn to work around this. For example, we had oral sex one night and the flash thought "did she do this to him" entered my head and immediately deflated me. These are issues I need to discuss in MC.

We are slowly but cautiously optimistic. MC said the true test will be how we feel in 6 months.