We actually are not friends on Facebook or LI. We had some issues with that awhile back and I decided it was not a battle I wanted to fight when things starting going downhill after his depression hit in July.

In fact I don't have a FB account, haven't since last summer because I felt it was just causing too many problems.

With the distance, I am not sure my M has much chance of surviving since we don't have the opportunity to see each other. A few texts from him with not much said and the dreaded phone call later tonight.

A growing part of me just wants him to send my the papers and have this be over. I find myself too tired to keep up with the yo-yo. I REALLY don't want to have the call - I almost prefer sending a text that says "Just file" and being done with it.

This call just has so much pressure on it and I know its just going to be him telling me we need to get D and how should we go about it. I don't know what to say to make a difference.

I feel like I am going to be sick...

Me:33 H:34
T: 3yrs M: 2yrs
H depression triggered and we are "unhealthy": 7/15
H wants to "make it work" 12/28
BD: 3/10/16