I have one more negative thought...but one that is necessary to keep.
I am not sure if I should file. Living in limbo can be dangerous to me. I was reading that financially my husband can build up debt ( I don't know if he would do this ), he can leave state (he has talked about this) and laws would change. Probably more stuff too.
I don't want to be the one to do it. For many reasons. I will have to discuss with an attorney again, but at 500 bucks an hour I don't like arranging meeting. I need to be sure I am going to do it. I also do not always trust attorneys, because I recognize they have agendas too .
You won't know your options until you speak to a L. It's very necessary. They may not all cost $500/hr, call around and see what they offer. But this is about your financial future for the next 15+ years, so you would want to have someone good.
When I saw a L, I brought a spreadsheet with all our assets and debts, income and monthly expenses, and a 3-page summary of the history of our M. I also brought the proof I had of the A. It was very helpful to the L and allowed her to get an overview of the facts quickly, so we could spend as much time as possible discussing my options. Make good use of your time with any L.
You can always put a stop to the D proceedings, but you can't undo what H is doing right now. I am very concerned about you and the children being unprotected financially and you giving him time to maneuver.
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17
