The snooping was not to manipulate or control W. It was to give you ease of mind OR to determine if you are on the right course. As for influencing her, isn't that what DB is all about. We do not control what W does but by controlling what we DO etc, we improve ourselves. After that either they do or they don't come round.

Yes I can relate to that reflective man. I know him well. I guess I am filling my mind with other more positive/more helpful stuff. I am doing this to seek self growth but regardless it is a good distraction.Glad the info was to your
liking.

Best wishes


R 25 years
M 14 years
S11 & S13
Working on it alone since Oct 2014
M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years)
Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr.
Next R chat Aug'17
Still together