I think your friend is correct in advising you to take over the mortgage issue. Your h is having a difficult time figuring things out and you do not want your credit rating ruined just because he can't figure out what to do and how to communicate w/the mortgage company.
Their brains aren't functioning up to par and their attention span is that of a gnat. As teenagers, they don't realize the consequences of not taking care of such things in a timely manner and ensuring that they follow up on things.
As for the candles...been there and done that one too!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
