Feeling he's in MLC, but in D process

[ciluzen]

So...Easter was odd. Had a nice time at D25's house. D23 was sick with a cold but she came with me to infect us all as we ate and chatted.

H was a no-show. Went to church with his "other family" instead. He did call as I was dropping D23 off to tell me he still wasn't feeling well and that he would be out later to work.

He came out much later than he wanted and was still not feeling well, so we started going through things in the house that he wanted to keep so I could box things up. Then, my emotions hit me... hard. "How can this not affect you? Isn't this in any way sad?" Thus commenced a big R talk. And some tears. We were both able to stay in a bit of control, though, and get through it. It just feels both so hopeless and, at the same time, like H shifts a little each time. Thinking about it more? He admitted that he had given up on things and felt bad about it; our house, our marriage. But no turning back. We agreed that we needed to be on the same page in working on D stuff, what to keep, what to sell, what to donate, what to trash.

We were able to get back to our task and end the day on friendly terms. He did ask what I was going to do after D; what my plans were. I told him about going back to school and how I hoped to buy a house at some point in the future. It was as if he had never heard me say those things before (I had...many times). MLC mind!

Not the Easter I wanted, but the Easter I got wasn't horrible. Still waiting for the Easter Bunny to drop those eggs on his head.