Moved here from newcomers as I don't feel a newcomer anymore. T: 12 years, M: 10 years, 2 young children. Not English speaker so when I moved to UK, got no family support from my side. Background: 6 years ago MIL died in tragic car accident while I has just given birth to my second child, my first one was 19 months old and was dealing with my dad having Leukaemia. Since we have been together we have moved houses 4 ( in a couple of months it'll be number 5 but separately this time), H has changed job 4 times. 3 years ago H mentioned that he wasn't happy, that he was going to put himself first and that he needed a holiday. We'd go on holidays in UK or back to my home town. H said few things about me and I try to rectify them but I found it hard to deal with two young children, a full time job, a dog and a house to run while H was only attending his needs. On Valentines day 2015 found out H was having an A for 2 years ( it started at the same time as him telling me he was going to put his needs first), I gave him a chance but found out that 2 weeks after he told OW it was over he has been back with her for 2 weeks! So I kicked him out. I did everything I shouldn't have done until I found DB. For the first 2 months after I kicked him out OW wasn't in the picture, but 2 months later H took his wedding ring off and told me it was over. Before he was back to OW he would stay at home longer and speak to me. Now I'm treated the same way as his ex-partner. Won't talk to me nor stay in the same room as me. H has a child from previous relationship and left kid when she was 3! Meet me 4 months later, our relationship was long distance for 6 months to start with. He is still with OW, says he doesn't live with her but I know he does, he meet her kids. He hasn't introduced her to our two, when I asked he said that our kids are happy like that, that in a couple of years there might be someone else. He has introduced stepdaughter to her but only once. H has bought a house nowhere near me OW. I went dark for a while but allowed him to come back to the house as kids wanted it. H is very cold towards me, since last week he has dropped kids at doorstep, whereas before he'd come in. Two weeks ago he asked for something that we seemly agreed on & I said I'd think about it but as it didn't go his way he started this not being in the same room as me behaviour.
Last Friday ( bank holiday) H decided to pick up kids early than his normal time expecting me to drop what I was doing to suit him ( like he was expecting me to be home as it was bank holiday). I validated him but also added that 3 hours notice before he wanted to change access time was a bit unfair as I could have planned something else. I added that I would be grateful if he could appreciate that at times he can't expect me to drop what I do to fit with his plans.
H told me that he would come and do a job while he drops present for daughters' birthday tomorrow. He didn't mention when, so I asked him when he said at some point during the day. I replied not possible, then he said in the afternoon, then replied not possible as I have guests. He said just before lunch which I replied not possible as guest are coming for lunch and I said that it'd be better if he could come in the morning. Didn't ask what time! Since that conversation last Friday, H is completely ignoring me in my own house. Sorry for any typo as I'm on my iPhone.
