Hi Vanillia. I think I still hold onto the hope of reconciliation while knowing it can never happen regardless of Ws thought or actions on the matter. This keeps the contact.
I never contact W , I will answer most of her calls and respond to texts but that's it. I don't pursue ( that I'm aware of ). Maybe you could look at an interaction for me and tell me if I am pursing without realising it
Last night W came to stay for the night and I was out dropping S20 to the pictures with some of his friends. When I got home W was in the boys shower and when she finished she came into the front room and showed me a picture of her father and my BIL BIL has not aged well and put on quite a bit of weight. I commented and then W went into tell me SIL and BIL are still having problems ( on going for 10 years ) Again I commented without any real opinion
W then asked me how she could tell which brake pads were worn in her car as the warning light was on. I offered to look today and then she said she was going to order the pads. Again I offered to fit them when she got them
I can see how this might be seen as pursuing but I would offer to do this for anyone and have done so for neighbours or guys I work with
W came into my bedroom this morning ( she knocked ) and made some conversation and left with D11 to get shopping I got dressed and left for the day. W leaves at 5pm to collect OW I will return after
W called a while ago and asked if I had left the town as she needed something collected from Post office and she had no photo ID ( Parcel was delivered to my house but no one answered door ) I had left the town so said so and said sorry
Vanillia , am I pursuing ? I am always up beat when talking to W , dressed well because I almost always do anyway at this stage and W will comment on how well I look or how nice my hair is She praises me for how Im a good dad and kids are lucky to have me I never mention her life and even when she leaves herself open for truth darts I don't fire them.
My take on my sitch is W regrets her choices ( she has apologised and admitted she was wrong for her actions ) BUT she is also accepting of her life now and will continue with it. I believe she thinks I've moved on and no longer wish to have an R with her so DB wise , I've done a decent job
I suppose we all reach a point where we have to move forward and while I'm not there on the inside and think W is She has OM ( whatever that maybe be ) and her new life It may not be great but it's what she has She is still very friendly to me and obviously cares for me but the desire to be M to me is gone
I would appreciate your comments becaus I am down at the moment and it's my own thoughts that have me there. Could I have done more ? I truly know it's too late but I still have doubts as to if I could have acted differently
