Betsey - Thank you for the kind words about D4. I learned something new about myself during that week of doctor's appointments and that is that in my post-divorce life, I find that when something bad happens, I'm a lot more likely to entertain the worst case scenario.
Originally Posted By: Underdog
now that you're divorced, there is a good chance OW is putting pressure on him to make things more permanent. It's a lot easier to take this out on you (especially if he blames you for the demise in your R, as stupid as that is) than it is to take it up with her.
I'm sure you're right - although their relationship seems pretty weird to me. First they live together, now they don't - and after seeing the kids on a weekly basis for a year - now she doesn't see them at all? Also his mom was just out here for D8's birthday and still no introduction. When he and I dated he could not wait to introduce me to his mom. Well, whatever, that's OW's headache to deal with. And not only does XH probably blame me for everything in the marriage, I have to say, it sure feels like he is doing his best to view me as a mean-spirited, vindictive b**** sometimes. He's forgotten to give me the CS check once or twice when we normally do it at child exchange the last week of the month, and then I get flooded with texts about how he didn't mean to do it - and he can make a special trip to drop it off, FedEx it etc. And I just reaffirm what I have told him in the past - that it isn't a big deal as long as I get it by the 15th. And if he ever has a cash flow problem one month - he just needs to let me know ahead of time and we can work something out. When the girls were sick last month and we agreed that he needed to take a day off from work to watch them after I had taken off several days, he copied me on the e-mail to his bosses to prove to me he had asked for the time off (something I would have never questioned).
You know - I never even hired a lawyer to represent me in court (I did have one look over what I had negotiated and what XH's lawyers wrote up to make sure everything looked good - but XH doesn't know that). I've accommodated every schedule request without issue(he has 10X the number that I do). I say nice things about him to the girls - I don't get how he finds the space to paint me as the bad guy - but I sure think he does.
I guess I will just take your advice, try to shrug my shoulders and say "Isn't that interesting?".
