I realize you are angry, frustrated and stressed over the business, but if the confusion that your BIL sees is any indication of the state of mind your h is in right now, HaWho is correct...you don't want him handling much of the business. Their attention span is that of a gnat. In other words, he can't focus very long on anything. It's just too much for them. I'm not making excuses but this is the way that they are. It's one of the reasons that I stress to posters not to write long text/email messages to them and keep it to one or two lines when posting to them.

I'm very sorry about your sister and will keep her in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that she's receiving good medical care.

I'm glad to read that you are going to spend Easter w/the in-laws. Try to enjoy your time there and relax a bit.

Happy Easter!

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.