the road goes ever on and on...

[Painter]

You might enjoy Elizabeth Gilbert's book, 'Committed', where she explores the concept of marriage, which she was terrified of trying a second time. I liked it a lot (she also wrote 'Eat, Pray, Love', which I haven't read). She talks about some of these concepts that you touch on.

Yesterday, I had dinner with a lovely friend (we sing in a choir together) who is in her 60's. She struggles almost every day with extreme loneliness and sadness in her M, which has now lasted 48 years. After the children moved out, she thought she and her H would enjoy life and travel. He got heavily involved in other activities and refused to travel anywhere, and she ended up feeling very, very lonely. She cries frequently over it (and I know how she feels, it's a constant rejection and grief). She told me she wished she had the guts to leave years ago, but feels it is too late now. She fills her life with activities and friends, but it is obvious that it she is suffering. And he's not even abusive...

Just wanted to put that out there... How can we deny the expectations we have been brought up with, of our partner being a source of love and not just a roommate or business partner?