We had a fairly major scare with D4. She's been having some problems with her eyes and while we were waiting for the specialist appt. she started to have other, scarier symptoms that made it seem like there might be something wrong with her brain. After two weeks that included visits to the ER, pediatrician, and three separate ophthalmologists, we finally got a diagnosis and a treatment plan. It's actually a very minor case of previously undetected farsightedness, but her brain is overcompensating for it in an unusual way. Long story short - she will wear glasses and if they don't help she will have surgery. Either way - very treatable and something that should be resolved within a few years.
However, in the middle of all of this, there was a tortured conversation with ex, where he was trying to explain how to get a hold of him if there was a sudden emergency with D4 - and it became clear that he is back with OW (I guess she's not really the "OW" anymore since we are divorced) and spends a few nights a week with her. There is a long story about this in some of my previous threads - but she lives in an isolated rural spot where there is no cell service or texting (this was an issue because he move in with her right after BD and it was very hard to communicate with him at times, and he finally had to cough up the landline number).
Anyway- was I upset by this news? Not at all, surprisingly. I still dread the thought that she will be in my kid's lives forever (and consequently in mine). However, I have to say that this explains so much about what I was complaining about in my previous posts - the lack of time that he spends with the kids and his frosty and distant behavior with me. I don't understand why being with her equates to being a distant and grumpy jacka** with me, but it does. And there is a surprising amount of peace in understanding that is what is going on. I actually feel much more relaxed now that I know that is what I am dealing with.
It's spring break. D8 has been begging for some one on one time with me - so I took the day off from work, we are going to take D4 to preschool and then go for a long bike ride with a picnic lunch.
