atesja

[roist]

Mut',

For me that is not living. Some people don't need others to have fun and enjoy life. But most people do.

I will admit that it is not easy, especially if being a loner has become a habit. I speak from experience. In the last year I have greatly increased my interactions with others, I do more stuff that I enjoy. I take pleasure in little stuff and enjoy myself at times. I am not at the really having fun stage yet but there are sparks of it from time to time. It is not automatic and will take time but it can be done.

One of Sandi's rules tells us to move on with our lives, with or without spouse. Another program phrased it like: show your spouse you are going to live your life and not be unhappy waiting for them to decide if they stay or go. Another says the happier you are the better your chances of saving your M. But it is even more important in saving the LBS.

You are a good man with a good heart. Many would have advised not to mention it. I think you were right to mention it being 30 years and that you don't regret your time together. I am not sure that mentioning working on it was a good step, even if you added that you respect her stance. I can explain why I think this, but I imagine you have read as much as I have on this.

Your W did not explode, did not reiterate her feelings and did nit restate categorically that will never happen. I am not saying that to give you false hope, but to highlight that it could have been a lot worse.

Now go show her that although you still want to reconcile that you are going to live your life fully regardless. ACTIONS speak louder than words.