Your wife is scared by the changes she's making and feeling lonely when she's home alone. That doesn't mean she wants to reverse course, it only means that sometimes she is scared and lonely.
Other times she feels fine and feels good about her decision. The inconsistent behavior you're seeing is relative to her state of mind. If she hangs out with a friend all evening and talks and has a good time chances are she will seem cold to you because she's feeling fine in her situation.
If, on the other hand, she sits home alone, no one is available and she has no one to talk to, she may feel lonely and desperate.
In those scenarios, you are her "insurance policy on the shelf" and she will reach out to you as a comfortable and known source of emotional support.
Once again, these oscillations don't have anything to do with what you're doing and saying, so the best thing you can do is just be consistent and live your life for yourself and your daughter.
I'm so sorry you're having a tough time -- it's tough for everyone, but it does get better!
Good luck,
Acc
Married 18, Together 20, Now Divorced M: 48, W: 50, D: 18, S: 16, D: 12 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 7/13/11 Start Reconcile: 8/15/11 Bomb Dropped (EA, D): 5/1/2014 (Divorced) In a New Relationship: 3/2015
