Long time

[Nel]

Update:
Well, I feel like there has been a subtle shift in H's behavior toward me. I don't know what to think about it, but I'm very very cautious. I'm glad I have a DB coaching session tonight.

For the past two weekends, H and I have gone to D17s overnight travel tournaments although we didn't travel together or stay in the same place. The first weekend, H did not approach me, but I did talk to him a few times during both days being both cheerful, fun, and friendly...walking a fine line between being too clingy and the cold-shoulder. He was super friendly, and I saw glimpses of the old H. My brother, SIL, and their three young kids were also there. They all went over and talked to H, and the kids and SIL hugged him when they left. That weekend made some type of an impact on H because I actually got a text from him the next day about a link that he thought I should read. The first text since January that wasn't about either the girls or something financial. Throughout the week, he talked to me when I saw him at work..again this is new.

This past weekend..another overnight tournament. He talked to me throughout the whole weekend. I always kept the focus on him, asking him about work, his other activities, etc. Then yesterday when he dropped off D19 (who is home on spring break) he talked for 30 minutes in the driveway. We never once spoke about our relationship but kept to neutral topics. I kept it light and flirty.

I did not include all the details of both weekends, but there is definitely a shift in his behavior toward me. I'm still not going to contact him first unless I absolutely have to and I'm going to let him lead. I've realized that I have no control of the situation at all. This is hard for me, but I need to let him work through these issues on his own which is why I'm leaving him alone. I don't think I can take anymore heartbreak, so I still have my guard up.

Nel