His behavior just goes to show just how messed up he is. He's adamant that wants a divorce and yet eats dinner at your house. MLC is very much like a bad soap opera because the drama keeps building and he's behind it.
No, you didn't mess up. We all slip and fall periodically and that's why we are here to help pick you up and get you back on your feet. No, you can't force him to change the way that he's looking at things right now. Nothing right now can change his mind, so it's best the just listen and validate. If the relationship talk is bothering you, then walk away, change the subject or tell him that you are sorry he feels that way, but right now you aren't up to discussing it any further. You do have control over whether you listen or not.
Something must have set him off again last evening. It may not have been you, the children or the MIL. It could have been someone said something to him...but again, you can decide just how much of the bs that you want to listen to. I think he keeps talking about it to convince himself and you that it's over and he's hoping that if he continues to talk to you about it, you'll say let's do it now. Don't allow him to push you into doing anything you are ready to do w/o speaking to a lawyer.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
