(Terry Jones): I think she's dead.

[LoisB]

Thanks Job. It was nice to read your post :-)

I agree about the car.

I'm not sure what I think. I have a long history with this woman and... it's the rest of the story and my instincts which are screaming out. I have a hard time with my MIL accepting no responsibility with the collapse of that relationship... knowing that she blames Louisa too for not continuing contact... even though I invited my inlaws to our home, repeatedly, to spend time with both girls and they ignored me. They also say Louisa cut ties, even though she was only nine when all of this went down and she has gone years without seeing her father, which makes it much harder to maintain a relationship with HIS parents. Still, no one in his family holds him responsible. Cal remains an easy target. They have been crying that she is ungrateful since this began and they cry the same river for Louisa...

Cal was a troubled teen. I posted much of the drama on here. My inlaws were helpful at first... but, when she began to turn things around, they weren't anywhere close to helping me with getting her into college or helping with the expenses. They've pretended that we didn't exist, because they could turn the other way. If you remember, one of the reasons I left Ohio was because they were spreading rumors in our town that I had cut them and Matt off from his kids.

I begged them at one point to help me with the divorce because I wasn't getting regular child support and they closed themselves off to our reality.

I feel conflicted on this one. I have such a long history of this woman being cold and harsh with me and my girls. She was always in charge of everything--our marriage/our parenting--and cut people out with no regard for anyone's feelings, but her own. I know Cal is a basket case right now... but, I think her grandmother's response is par for the course. There's such a long history with my MIL.

Apparently, now, the pressure is on for Cal to respond. I figured Cal was in contact with Matt... it all makes sense. She feels alone, she is using, she knows my mom won't help, I won't help and my dad is questionable... So, Matt is the obvious next person in her alcoholic mind to reach out to... the father who uses marijuana daily and hasn't been there for her in years. What's hard is all of the pieces of MY life that I'm sure Cal has shared with Matt. I know that when my daughter feels desperate she throws everyone under the bus, including me.

The next part shows me that nothing has really changed. Grandma is still calling the shots in his life.

I received a text this morning from Cal...

"Dad called me and told me I have to respond to Grandma ASAP."

Its' sorta our marriage in a nutshell. Grandma... the center of the universe is now on alert and requires action. Matt will take the stand to defend his mother because that's what he does. He does what he is told... when his mother dictates.

This will be interesting. I'm not responding to Cal's text. She invited this crazee back into her life. SHE needs to handle it. If she presses. That's my take.

Still, it's like them coming back into my life... even though it's indirect and I feel the panic of... "What will they do? How will I get hurt this time?"