It's over...no more need to DB

[Sotto]

Hey Broke, I am so sorry to read of this my friend. I think you show much wisdom in your postings and it is good that you have come as far as you have. This is a very tough thing to discover - especially with a long M like yours. I can see that it must make the many happy times seem like a lie and I'm sure it will take time to work through your feelings about this.

As for being done - well of course you get to decide. Serial cheating is a deal breaker for many, understandably. It may not be a deal breaker for all. However, I do think it can be tough (from what I read) for serial cheaters to change. There is a need to address what underlies the need to cheat over and over - and normally the underlying factor is difficult to face (perhaps childhood abuse for example... Etc.)

Whether he wants to ask for another chance and whether or not you want to offer one will all unfold in time. However, do please know that this is all about him. A friend of mine (with a much shorter M) recently discovered her H has cheated throughout - even sending inappropriate texts to someone on their wedding night! They have two kids under five and she has just finalised their D, which I can understand. She just had no wish to try and save things, given all she had discovered.

I would encourage you to keep posting and I know from what you post that your growth will continue. Once again, I'm so very sorry and do take care xx