Still moving in a new direction

[mleigh4]

H was a no show for counseling. Job, you knew that was going to happen, didn't you? The appt was at 4:00. At 4:08, while I was still waiting, I TM him, are you ok? Or just a no show for appt?

He responded, I'm really sorry. I'm in Redwood City, just got out of a meeting that was supposed to be done at 3....I'm a no show.

I have not responded, really unsure if I should or what to say. There are many things I WANT to say, but I am disappointed, angry, hurt, amused and annoyed right now. So, best to not react on those emotions. I did not give him any reminders of this appt, I gave him the information and left it to him to remember, so I am not surprised.

We went on with the counseling anyway. It was just me and the therapist. I told her right away that I don't want to dredge up all the marriage stuff, that basically this appt was to help H and I find some middle ground in our parenting styles. She asked basic questions and I told her the basic stuff. After the session, we both decided if H isn't going to be a part of this, no sense in going back. She said I sound like I am doing great and the only suggestion she had was to be more aware of supporting H and his house rules with S. She said it's common for each house to be run different, during separation or divorce, and to let S know that that is ok, but he needs to follow the rules each home has and be respectful of BOTH parents.

Wasn't he preaching to me about responsibility, being spoiled and ungrateful? I set this appt because HE has issues with my parenting and our son, and I was totally willing to hear them out because I know I need to be better with the chores! Oh well, his loss. I tried and that's all I can do.

What do you think? Respond or just stay mysteriously quiet? I am sure he is expecting a bashing