So Much Time is Passing By Pt. II

[HopeRB]

Had to contact H about a bill and started talking about other bills. I validated, didn't blame, beg, nothing, yet let him know that I am in deep with all this financially. This prompted to him to say let him know what I need help with and that he would "come by" to help, that we'll take care of this stuff together, and that he doesn't want me to have be stressed either. Then he proceeds to tell me about yet another new job.

I feel like I'm the twilight zone...it's as if he doesn't care or is completely oblivious to the fact that of what is happening. I congratulated him about his new job and then he asked me how my search is going. And he asked me about the status of my current job and if there's anyway for me to stay on. We already spoke about this last time I saw him (a fact which I mentioned), but why this really bothers me is that my job is moving all of my team's roles to our corporate office in another state. I considered it for a moment but then declined. I wasn't going to tell H, but I did end up telling him when I saw him and he said, "You should go, even if its for 2 months while you look for something else..." I told him I wouldn't be doing that b/c I have no one there and its a completely different way of life from NYC and I just can't do that right now, and he got quiet. Basically, I took him prodding me to go as him telling me that he's completely done with our M. So when he said something about staying on again today, I took it as if he is saying, "Are you sure you don't want to go?"

I know, mind reading but how else am I supposed to take it?! I'm upset that he has a nice, shiny new job, frolicking about town, and I'm stuck here to trying to make it. I'm glad we can have civil convos but I just get so upset that he is so oblivious. Is this what him coming back around looks like or am I just reaching for any sing of hope, even if its false? In the meantime, I'm detaching and trying to stay light and breezy when interacting to him but I feel slightly like a fool: how do you validate and stay light and breezy while trying ti stand up for yourself and handle business, all while NOT pushing WAS further away? I've just been pretty annoyed and bitter last few days but God help me that it doesn't take root in my heart.