I know what you meant vapo, I was just adding a little humor to my crappy mood
Me 34, XF 27 Many years together Son 4 Engaged Not engaged Many false starts by XF 7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life 2/17 girlfriend moves in my home
I know what the answer is prolly gonna be, and I'll prolly get 2x4's flying at me for even asking. But, due to some of the things that were said and done the past few weeks by XF I don't know if maybe I could play this out a little differently than normally suggested?
One of the big things she kept going back to in those long conversations is that she misses us, misses having our family and that she does still love me. I have been thinking (didn't do it) if I were to randomly send a picture of us together having fun or the 3 of us together, that would prolly set me back? Just curious if maybe that would be a subtle reminder to keep her mind thinking that way?
More than likely it's not a good idea, I just wanted to run it by everybody here...
Swing away, I'm ready to duck haha
Me 34, XF 27 Many years together Son 4 Engaged Not engaged Many false starts by XF 7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life 2/17 girlfriend moves in my home
Nope! Go back and read the Last Resort Technique in DR. Michelle specifically mentions that if WAS starts to show an interest in us again that we remain calm and don't start pursuing. It will spook the squirrel right back up the tree.
In fact, I think I can safely assume that you already did spook with W with all of the R talk. You guys started talking waaaaay too much IMO. And talking too often as well.
Dont panic. I think she'll come back around. But don't start talking too much or too much about the R. You have to ease into that stuff very slowly over time.
I figured that was coming! Haha I do have to re read the book, it's been on the shelf for prolly 2 months. Get myself a refresher
Me 34, XF 27 Many years together Son 4 Engaged Not engaged Many false starts by XF 7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life 2/17 girlfriend moves in my home
When my H came home for a funeral, I saw him looking at a couple photos of us that sit in my house. I didn't say a peep. Just watched him and let it go.
When I was with my H this weekend and we were talking, though, I found myself bringing up a few fond memories from our college days. Not about our R, but about a few experiences we had together. He laughed, but I kind of wish I'd only done it once, rather than once too many! Not sure I got to that saturation point, but I question things a lot and worry I overdid.
It's kind of the same thing you were thinking about when you were debating sending a photo, Uphill. Better not to go there, especially in an email which hangs around. Words fade over time, but emails are forever, and if they're irritating, that's a bad thing.
H: 44, Me: 45 Married: 20 y Together: 25 y no kids Walk away: 12/15 Asked for temp separation 12/25/15 PA confirmed 3/16 (apparently neither the first, nor the last PA he has had) H filed for D 5/16
Just for the record, I didn't send anything. It was on my mind and I seriously thought about it but didn't. Thought better of it and came here to air it out instead and the responses confirmed what I thought...
Me 34, XF 27 Many years together Son 4 Engaged Not engaged Many false starts by XF 7/16 new girlfriend comes into my life 2/17 girlfriend moves in my home
Just for the record, I didn't send anything. It was on my mind and I seriously thought about it but didn't. Thought better of it and came here to air it out instead and the responses confirmed what I thought...
