My first post - please be nice.

[collin]

Bulldog,
I guess I really don't understand my plan of attack. Because (i know don't believe half of what she says and all of what she does) she's pretty much explicitly said that she IS moving out. I don't know if I tried to change to her mind if it would do any good or just hurt. Because when I do try to talk her about it, she claims I don't respect her or her decision to move out.

So, it may be wrong way to approach it. But i've just been using this time as a waiting period, a calm before the storm if you would. Then once she leaves, start dating my wife the way I should've been doing. I'll take her out, take her home, walk her to her door and tell her goodnight.

She's throwing mixed signals to me though. She's talking about there's a reason why they give you a year, so you can try to work it out. Then, on the other hand, she says, why don't you want me to be happy? what if i meet someone and find someone who shows me he loves me? I told her then, I don't know if you feel like you need to go live the single life and go dating or whatever, but that's not what i'm going to do. I'm going to take this time to work on me, to make me a better me, to be a better husband for you. She then was like, i never said i was going to go looking for date. I told her well guys just don't fall out of the sky (and then yes, i had "it's raining men" stuck in my head for a while after that).

And, for what it's worth...she still is agreeing to go to counseling (once she's moved). So, I guess I still have that to hold on to. That even with her moving out, counseling is still on the table. I just don't want to press my luck and press the issue and then her not want to go to counseling.

I think (my opinion - but I am certainly open to others) that my best bet now is to not do anything to make her mad. Not try to pursue anything. Just sort of be a really good roommate for now. Help cook, clean, take care of dogs, take daughter places, etc... So when she moves out, she'll be like..."well dang...now what?"