Way Too Late Pt 3

[1313]

New thread continued from here.

Yeah, court tomorrow. Yay!

...Yep, now you see how this makes a lot more sense than what you were describing last week? You were stressed for no reason...

Regarding the dog: I suppose it will be a non-issue. I wonder if your WW will show up tomorrow? Chances are you'll get the dog if it even comes up. Just have your evidence ready and convince the judge.

I'm on the other side of the support issue, which really bites. I'm the faithful husband yet I'm stuck paying my WW 40%+ of my net take home pay?!? How does that make sense??? I can understand if I'm the one who cheated on her. But because she had it easy before BD, I have to "maintain her lifestyle" through the divorce proceedings? I tell you, this is the one thing I find terribly unfair. I am totally fine paying child support but paying alimony to someone who did me wrong? I hate it.

CWOL, It's funny how some of us would gladly switch States to get the D laws of someone else. Personally, I think the CA laws blow - that they could care less about adultery. It's still a 50/50 split. And designed to be as fast as possible.

But for a lot of people - it's also fair. Just like it would be for poor broke.

CWOL - I am in the opposite boat - my H moved me to a state with no spousal support one year before he dropped the bomb. I will get no alimony even though I stayed at home (both of us decided this together so I gave up one career and never started another). So, I get nothing going forward for the 14 years I spent raising his kids and taking care of them while he built up his career traveling every week and screwing his co-worker the last 8 months. Even tonight (his overnight with the boys) I will pick them up from school and feed them until he gets them at 6. I am not complaining only because that gives me more time with the boys, of which I will take every minute I can. I understand your frustrations. I think infidelity should negate any spousal support or the person responsible should be the one to pay it.

Sorry for the hijack 1313

See broke, now that really stinks. You're in a State that gives you zip. California you'd get half of the estate, and spousal support (you'd still need to show you're actively seeking employment in most cases. And I can't believe you found a state that does this to the spouse, and not have any laws on the books about adultery! Most of the ones I've seen - if they don't split the estate they punish the spouse who's having the affair. And with you - you gave up your career which was a decision you both made - and now you're suffering for it.

Man, there are a lot of jerks roaming the planet. And here we are, wishing they would turn back into the people we married.

I would do anything to reconcile this M. I still can't believe that "I told my attorney to stop the divorce" with WW translation means "I'm not getting what I want, so I want to do something different to get more". This has been almost as big a kick in the gut as the original BD. I tried not to get excited, and to consider it being some sort of sick trick.

But it's been devastating.

So, I've pulled together all the docs I can find to get my dog even for a few days a week.

I watched the video I took on 1/27 - the last time I saw her. It was nice listening to her license tinkling as she followed me around the house. I wish I knew that was the last I'd see her for so long - I'd have spent an extra few minutes holding her.

Sigh. I've got to go fix dinner for my Mother - I'll try to visit later and spend time on someone else's thread. Mine is too depressing. It's nice seeing people who stand a chance.