I swear there some sparkling somewhere...(4)

[Sparkls]

Old thread: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...=11&page=11

Quick recap for those just tuning in:
Together: 8 years. Known him for 10.
Noticed he was withdrawing sometime in December.
Got a speech about how he wasnt sure he wanted to be with me and was going to tell me when I moved for residency that he wasn't coming with me.
Found out a few days later about OW via an instagram post on his phone. Confronted him, he admitted to it freely. Waffled for a day or so saying he didn't know if he wanted to be with me. Said "when I"m with you, I want to be alone and when I'm alone I want to be with her." I left to stay with friends for a few days, found out he immediately hate OW over to my home. I kicked him out on valentines day. We've essentially been no contact except for him picking up more of his things.

So where do I sit in all of this?
I don't want to give up on our 8 years together. Yes I'm young, yes I could easily move on. But Ive planned a life with this man and its not a life I want to just give up. His friends/family all think he's being an idiot excpet for OW and OW's bestie who he lives with now.

Today, I'm super angry for whatever reason. I deserve so much better than this. He's capable of so much more than this.
I guess I'm hoping he'll break through the wayward fog and try and come home but I'm seeing no signs of that. No signs of any progress. No signs of any doubt. He claims he's moving back to Colorado. I have some feelers out to see if OW is going with him. I'll believe it when I see it. I don't think he realizes how hard it is to move across the country. I guess I cant help but feeling like if he's going to move OW 2000 miles away from her support system when she literally had a mental breakdown over not being able to dump her last boyfriend, he's going to feel obligated to stay with her, as he claims he felt "obligated" to stay with me because I've been through so much with him. Ironic, no?

And to think, last night I had convinced a very small part of myself that his texts had gotten a little more... human? (You can look on my old thread to see all the texts he's sent me since d-day).
I think it's all in my head. Believe actions, right? His actions show nothing.