[BrightFuture]

Sotto, thanks for stopping by. Please don’t diminish your support. I appreciate all the opinions that you guys post to me. I have been keeping up with your posts and also reading your posts to others. You have a lot of good advice to share. Yes, you might approach the things differently and your circumstances are different, but I still learn a lot from you. In my case, if there would be a known OW, who knows how I would react.

Job, I have the impression from your posts that you think I should stop doing things for H and cut him dry. I read on other threads that people are encouraged to develop/maintain some kind of friendships with their spouses. I’m not sure if I’m misreading it, but it seems to me that it doesn’t apply to my sitch. I really don’t understand what is different with me.

after all, you've been doing a lot of stuff for him and as long as he's got someone doing this stuff for him, why would he want to think about cutting ties?

I think he would want to cut ties with me because this is what he wanted to do, because he was unhappy with me, because he wanted to be free of me, to start his new “phase” of life... I’m sure he is smart enough to understand that he cannot truly start the next phase of his life while still connected to me. And… allowing me to stay at the condo… and allowing me to keep my clothes and my stuff in the bedroom… and having the joint accounts, etc…

I constantly think about this enabling thing though… I think I just have to naturally come to the point when I would not want to do this anymore. This would mean that I would be completely DONE. No way back. The thoughts of him not being that guy anymore constantly cross my mind recently.

I think that he tries to keep these ties with me and also being nice, because he feels that I’m moving on.

I’m also not sure what else I can do for GAL… I went to a St. Patrick’s Day parade and activities yesterday. We did ride on a fire truck – the old one, from the museum. We had a lot of fun! A lot of drinking too… Today, I went to my hair stylist and got my hair done, then cooked dinner, my son came over after the gym, we ate and I gave him lots of leftovers. He is taking 5 classes at the university and working full time (well, with the exception when he takes the classes.) He was very appreciative about the food I gave him.

Job, is there something I’m missing? I think I do things for me all the time (I actually think that I even became too selfish in this department, LOL), but you keep asking me what I do for me. What is it you see that I don’t see? I would really like to know.