Haha, thats very true about the weekends Day. I used to be itching to leave work on Fridays b/c I couldn't wait to get into some mischief with H. Now it's like, "Well I can do this, and go here, etc." Basically reaching for anything that will get my mind off of things.

I need to take action and having anxiety b/c I don't want to. B/c to me that means the end and all hope is lost. The struggle is so freaking real.

So many thoughts every minute of everyday. I want to scream. I literally want to throw my hands up and scream. But I won't. B/c that would be crazy right? Lol. I did the gym thing a little while ago and going to have dinner with a friend in a little but that I kind of know through H - she knows and talks to H's best friends. Oh, and I also got a ride to church this morning from one of H's other best friends this morning (he's live upstairs from me). That was hard b/c we used to hang out with him ALL the time...tried to stay light and smile. Oh well.

"Be messy and complicated and afraid and show up anyways."