This is all just giving me a headache. I'm trying to give it as much time as possible to see what he does. We're getting messages about things that are now late, overdue. But I'm giving him the opportunity to initiate contact.
I'm also feeling a bit irritated b/c I have to rent out my apartment to a stranger so I can have help paying my bills and to save up and move to another apt. I don't want to have a some stranger in "our" place. I don't want to live with anyone but H. And I don't want to have to move without H. And I know ppl say it doesn't matter if I move out of our marital space to my own place, that will not determine whether or not we get back together, but I can't help but feeling like me moving will solidify the end of our M.
"Be messy and complicated and afraid and show up anyways."
