Now what?/ One Day at a Time

[Sotto]

Hi Melweb, well it is good he has at least admitted the PA and it is good that you managed to remain so calm. It sounds like the A is a bit of non-starter....M with 3 kids and 3 hours away?? Presumably her H is unaware at this point? All sounds like a volatile situation and who knows how things will play out.

For you, I would re-read MWD's info on last resort technique as I think this is the approach you need to be taking at this point.

If he is active in an A, the infatuation hormones are likely to be running high and he is likely to be 'out' of the M for some time. I think the best thing you can do is step back and let things run their course with the A. I would consider your own boundaries here and strongly maintain them.

For me, I told my H - while there is an ongoing R with OW, there will be no R with me. I suggest you stop with any kind of R talks at this point. If he chooses to end things with OW, then there could be some R talk again. Also, if you haven't done so already, I would start taking due steps to protect your interests in the event that he does leave in June.

I'm sorry all this is happening and I hope he wakes up, but if he is in MLC it tends to take a good while, so it is best to let him go for now. Time will tell and it will be best spent focusing on you, whilst he pursues this (frankly doomed from the start) R with OW.

Take care, you're doing really well under tough circumstances xx