How do you work on a friendship with a view to saving a marriage?
My opinion is that as long as one of them wants out of the M, they are not going to view friendship in the same capacity. Let's say the woman is wayward and the man is hoping to reconcile the M. She looks at his friendship in ways she can benefit, like selfishly using him for whatever she needs at the moment. He looks at the friendship as being time for them to get closer and slowly start working on the MR. If he ever tells her no, then she cries, "But I thought you wanted to be friends", and if he tries to be anything more....she reminds him real quickly they are only friends. So, he gets the short end of the stick anyway he goes.
They need to have the same objective. Once the wife ends her wayward behavior and is ready to save the M, then they will have the same objective and can be friends.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
