Still hoping for progress

[daybyday]

Thanks Broke. You're right i know. Just feel everything slipping away slowly and it seems so permanent. I kind of echo Thorntons earlier sentiment about how W was his world. That was how I judged my worth. I thought i had self esteem. Maybe it was completed by W feelings for me when she was in love with me. Now that she is not, i doubt everything about myself and feel like a reject on the trash heap. It also scares me to think that I may Db for who knows how long and her say, Im not coming back. I'm done. I feel old and if I dedicate myself to this for many months or a year, who wants an old man? I am no ogre but I'm no Don Juan either. It also hurts that W is so detached, just like all of our walk aways. I thought when we got married that I overkicked my coverage as my W is Don't very beautiful. At this juncture, she is proof that beauty is skin deep. Then why do I still love her? Old habits are so hard to break.