Squiggy- you always brighten up my day when you post.
Brooke- I think she didn't call because the last 2-3 times she has I wasn't home so she just decided to show up and if I was home to stop by. I have been invited over a lot and just haven't been able to go because last time I cried having to leave and I don't want his parents to see me crying and hurting.
txhubby- That comment made me smile. Oh gosh.
Pink-
Quote:
One day, all the sudden I said NO. It was from inside of my gut. I was not mad, not sad. I just said it wasn't for me anymore. Then I felt good.
It took me a long time to let go on the physical affection. I won't punish myself for that. I am glad I learned my value.
I think I am at the point(at least how I feel today)
Quote:
If you want your H back, you need to let him go. Take this time as a vacation from him and do things you want to do for yourself. He will pay attention, he will have 2nd toughs, and if he decide to be an idiot, then at least you will be in a way for a much better life because you will be a better person.
I joined kickboxing today to get some anger out. Like legit kick boxing. I want to beat the crap out of someone so I might as well do it in a way that I won't end up in jail lol.
My mom told me the same with my MIL. My mom still calls my grandma and says Hi ma, and they talk. She has always been close to my grandma talking on the phone and always had my grandma there. She said if I keep pushing them away that I will regret it in the end. I believe that too now. I just feel like a sad pathetic person around them since I always get teary eyed when I have to leave or they leave.
Love you too pink. I know I will be happy again someday. Somedays I feel amazing and other, like today..I honestly want to cry all day in bed and eat ice cream with the kids and not get dressed. Maybe it's okay to have days like today as long as it's once in a blue moon and not like a daily thing.
I wish I had all of you guys as friends in real life. My friends all kinda suck in real life. Except 2-3 of them. They just say move on, get over it, it's been 3 months, you still aren't filing yet? etc etc etc. I almost refuse to talk about my H with anyone since it just brings me down and makes me feel awful.
I really want to spend my first paycheck and some of my savings and splurge on makeup and clothes for myself. It makes me sad that the OW is the person who taught me how to do my makeup so well and got me slightly addicted to the nice brands, it just looks so good on me. Like I feel sexy when I am all done up now a days. I need to go get more but it is easily 200-400$ of makeup I want to buy, which would be dumb.
I AM 186.8 LBS YOU GUYS. I was 285 the day I came home from the hospital with D3. I'M SO CLOSE TO 100LBS from a size 22 to a size 10-12. I need to have excess skin removal surgery since my stomach is so bad. Google excess belly skin after weight loss and yeah that is what my belly looks like. It makes me hate looking in the mirror without clothes on.
