I just wanted to clarify - I wasn't suggesting the whole 'single friends' thing as meaning 'closing the door.' My H is about to finalise our D sadly. I have a number of single friends now - male and female. I tell anyone up front that I accept all invites (well most) - but not dates. I already decided that I don't want to date for the whole of 2016. Then we'll see.
For me, I still haven't completely closed the door on our M. Though I have let go of the outcome and I accept we will D. And whilst I feel sad, my life is generally happy and I look forward to the future. I would only consider reconciling with H if all conditions are right, and I'm certainly not interested in a R with someone who wants to text,sext, flirt and go out with other women.
But I am further down the road than you. We also don't have kids together and were married for less time.
CWOL - detachment is more about not being so emotionally invested in a situation. It's about seeing what your WAS is doing, but not seeing it as 'being done to you.' It is about you having your life and they theirs for now. Therefore what they choose to do need not really impact on you. It is about observing as though you were a third party and having a rational insight into what is going on. There is some good content on detachment on the site, so do have a read. It takes time to feel more detached and it ebbs and flows too - sometimes I feel more so, and sometimes less so.
Hope this helps anyway xx
T 13 M 7 Me 48 H 46 SS 15 BD 7.14 PA D final 5.16 (H filed)
We receive & we lose, and must try to achieve gratitude & embrace with whole hearts whatever of life that remains after the losses - Dubus
