Please discuss with your counselor about your how you hoard your thoughts and cannot let go of them.
I hope the CBT will help you in this area.
I continue to be impressed with how you work to get in better physical shape. I know it is not easy and takes self-discipline. That says something good about you, Ghost.
Has any appointments been made for your D17 to receive therapy?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!