First - stop postponing and bye that DR or DB right now. You are giving excuses and it is time for your actions. You are a grown up man that can get some cash or buy from amazon as mentioned above.
Second - I didn't want to be there for my XH moving out, but eventually I was. And I helped a little. I just told him that I did not agree, but that I respected his decision.
It's up to you. Just remember that being her friend is better then being her enemy or a stranger.
It's not the end if you start getting yourself in a better place. Yes it is hard and some days you want to find a very deep hole and hide in there.
But it does not help at all to despair. Stand up, grab God's hand and start looking into yourself. List what you like and keep it, list what you can work on and change, list what is totally bad and work to break those habits.
It's hard work and it takes time. You are in shock, your emotions are all over the place. It helps if you get into some counseling, just for yourself. Look for someone pro marriage so he will help you to get better with a purpose that you want.
If you feel like you can't function, then talk to your doctor, get some mild AD just to break the edge and make you function in your normal life.
Help yourself first. It's not going away very easy, it's the focus you put in yourself and your purpose that will make you feel better.
Right now, doing nothing is actually doing a lot for your R. It feels it's not productive, but in reality it's the best you can do.
Start small, like how do you look? Do you like your hair, your size, your clothing style? If not, change.
What are your hobbies, if you don't have one, look into something you like. Get busy.
Next time I stop here, I wish I can see a list of your goals. If you get confused, write here and we will help you.
Most importantly, do not beg, talk too much, complain, be needy. Just stay strong in front of her, validate her decision, wish her the best, tell her that if she needs anything, she can call you.
The point here is that she will be a little confused with your reaction, then with time you will show persistence with your changes and maybe she will become curious and will try to find out what is going on.
Believe that the process can work. It will make you a better person, even if your W never comes back. You will be thankful you gave yourself a chance to learn and become a better guy for someone else.
