Still hoping for progress

[Thornton]

Hang in there, D.

You have us. We are here to support you. Be brave, you're going to make it through this.

[daybyday]

Thanks Tim B and T. Had about 30 spots frozen off of my hands and arms. No cancer biopsies done. Thats good news. Go back in two months. hit the gym right after and feel a small sense of relief.

W has been trying to be considerate and pack her things when I am gone. Today I got home a little early and she was packing up er curio cabinet. It does make me sad but it is necessary.

She came out into the garage and was kinda kicking the floor and I could tell something was bothering her. I asked what was on her mind? She says "I'm sorry. I have been trying to pack when your not here so you don't have to see" I said it's okay. It has to be packed up. i understand. Then she offered to go get us some beer.

I can tell she is stressed over the logistics of moving. I sympathize with her, but it is her want so she needs to figure out the plan. I'm being as helpful as I can, but I am not doing it for her. She has tunnel vision right now and I am not in that tunnel so I am just backing off and letting her do her thing.

On a "good for me" note, this Divorce Diet is working wonders. 40lbs. down as of today. By the beginning of september I plan to be in the best shape of my life, both physically and healthwise. I would like to say mentally also. I will work on that.

Did i say I was sick of hearing about her move? lol

[broke]

Great news from the doctor. Really glad to hear it. Keep up the DB'ing....good to hear about your healthy eating and weight loss. Unfortunately, the mental health is moment to moment with all of this!

[Vapo]

Why wouldn't you do cancer biopsies? Ignoring it will not make it go away...

[daybyday]

I didnt ignore it. They were just not needed per dermatologist.

[daybyday]

I just have to stand back in bewilderment as WAW makes her plans to move. Everything else just goes by the wayside. It's too surreal. No fights or blowups. Just business as usual.

It's almost as if doing this were on her bucket list. She has to be a troubled sort.I feel sorry for her. I hope that she decides to want to try to work on M before I decide that I am done with her.

I have done pretty well lately with DB. Not pursuing or R talk. Leaving conversations first etc. She is having to rely on her parents for money if something happens with her lease.

We have all accepted our parts in all of our situations so I AM improving myself trying to correct bad habits, listen more than talking. She has become the talker with no listening.
It's all about HER day etc. Just venting my frustration with it all.

[Thornton]

Im so happy about the new from the Dr! That stuff is soooo stressful.

Regarding W, you are doing great, D. You really are.

DB is a process, not a quick fix. It's series of several thousand baby steps. Don't fight your W moving out. It will FEEL like it the absolute end of your R but it's just one of the steps you need to take.

Stay the course and trust the process. Don't give her any reasons to not doubt her decisions.

She wants to leave? Let her leave. She thinks all her problems will magically dissipate. In reality, it's a jungle out there.

Now is the time for you to become so incredibly bada$$, that if W is blind to your progress, eventually you will meet someone that puts your W to shame.

I've been putting all my focus on the gym lately. I train like I'm Rocky Balboa preparing to fight the big Russian lol. I use my pain as the fuel to keep going, to stay motivated.

Find something that drives you. Something to be passionate about. That will help take your mind off of W. Make her regret her decision, D.

[daybyday]

Thanks T. I appreciate it. It is a necessary step I know. Isn't that sad. I have accepted it. I will be that bad-ask. I think I will find more passions once she is out.

I am in a much better place after a little good news yesterday. it sounds like you are too. Keep it up man, we are all here for you.

One more question, how do you all attach your situation "stats" to the bottom of each post? Is that a cut and paste for every post or is their a way to do that permanently? Duh!

[daybyday]

I have a question. I am going to her parents house with her this saturday to help load up a bedroom set to be brought to her apt. I will be staying in that town and going to my sisters afterward. She will be leaving to go back to our town to her apt. and move her stuff.

I hope that there is no big production of hugs and saying goodbyes from her, because I dont look at it that way.

But, if there is, if she says something like "Goodbye, I'm so sorry DBD", what would be a good response?

[Vapo]

WTF are you helping move her bedroom on which she will be most probably having fun without you?!?