"Not yet, I have just been reading the posts here and absorbing as much of this as I can."

Not good enough. That's why your thinking is so scattered. You can't just go on the Cliff Notes version of this stuff. When do you plan to get them?

M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER