Now, the real work begins...Part III

[NYGal]

Sure, why not take them? Wait a while before responding. Even if it's guilt, it's something nice he's done. Or you could say, great, this way I can invite S's BFF to come too, and I can bring hot guy I just met. Well, maybe not really...

[grelber]

My instinct would be no - "thanks, but no thanks" - send a clear message you're doing it yourself, and don't need his help...

Did he respond to your ask about picking up S15? Feels like that's the more helpful thing he could be doing for the family, and he should be focused on that versus trying to wow you and your S12 with "better" seats...

[broke]

Thanks for responding NY and grelber - this is typically how my H showed his love when we were married, by making grand gestures instead of doing the little things. He did say he would pick up S15 from counselor's office.

I'm not sure what to do. I paid double what he did so I may be able to sell my tickets and get some of the money back which would be the only benefit….

[NYGal]

I guess I think that WAH's still need to feel like they can provide for the family, so if this makes him feel better about himself (or about you), it' can't hurt. I hope more folks weigh in.

[Sparkls]

My brain is blanking, do you know if he's still with OW?
If so, I would employ the thanks but no thanks (the idea being Oh, you're still with OW? Then I don't really want anything to do with you). If not, I'd take it a gesture and take them.
JMHO.

[broke]

The last I've been told is he is NOT with OW but that was a month ago. He could be back with her I would have no idea.

I guess he knows I took care of it myself, so I could take the tickets and try to recoup some of the costs. I'm going to take another hour and think it through. If anyone has a reason I absolutely shouldn't I'd love to hear it.....

[broke]

So I just texted back that we'd take the tickets if he still had them. I said thank you. I kept it short and to the point.

The really crappy thing is just as I was feeling better and not concerned about any interaction with H for 4-5 days, he contacts me with a nice gesture. And I'm happy to have the contact even though I know that this doesn't mean anything. He was making nice gestures the whole time he was lying and cheating. In fact, I think the nice gestures came after spending time with the OW. I think the guilt does it. Too bad the guilt doesn't cause him to want to save his marriage and family.

I HATE being on this roller coaster. I'm so ready to get off this ride. I don't want to care....I want to be indifferent. Ugh. I'm not going to let this take me off track today though. I'm making the choice to stay even. I feel strong enough (today) to not go too low on the roller coaster.

Thanks for the advice guys!

[Tyler12]

Anyone else ever think our S are on their own forum about how to keep us on the line? It was only 2 days ago I went through the same thing. It's like they are organizing this crap and taking turns.

Hmm. Been awhile since i screwed with brokes feelings. Hey Tyler's W what did you donate other day again to see if he still talks to you?

I think it's great you had tickets already. and why not take advantage of being able to recoup some cost or invite someone else.

[TimR]

I agree with Tyler, I also got contact with my WW today. She was kinda just checking in. I feel like I have been on the verge of a panic attack the rest of the day, heart pounding rapid breathing etc.

Maybe I will google cheaters anonymous to see?

[Tyler12]

See. Undenialable proof. That's 3 in 2 days. Just turn the ringer off if you can and put the phone away somewhere. It beats seeing if you missed something and worrying about it