Still moving in a new direction

[mleigh4]

Hey Bttrfly, I too would choose building a new marriage over being single at 46. I'm trying, really digging for patience...thank you for the spew apron! I love the color ((hugs))

GOOD NEWS. H says he will do counseling with me. He gave me times that work for him . I will schedule an appt and hope he follows through. This could be a game changer for us.....

I am surprised, I expected him to avoid it, then I could say, I'm done! But there he goes, throwing another curve ball. I think this all threw me into my funk because I really thought we were making progress. I thought we got through that phase, and then there it was, snowball after snowball of bash and spew on my mothering. I know, fueled by MIL, possibly projection, but it still hurts.

So I walked with dog this morning, pointing out the sunrise, the birds singing, the beautiful flowers blooming to myself. Time to shake this off. I am taking a MLC vacation until we start our therapy! That should stir up some fun emotions, I'm a little nervous.

Yesterday was S bday. I picked him up after school, we went and got frozen yogurt for my office. H came over after with a small Mine craft cake. We then all went together to see Kung Fu Panda, H invited me. It was a nice time. I still feel on guard, and I politely listened while H talked about how he is a counselor to his guys at work and told me the story of one guy having problems with depression and took a month off. He was talking and talking, I had to push him to avoid being late for the movie, we just made it.

I feel fatigued! This weekend is going to be about pampering me. It should be a perfect rainy weekend to do so. Happy Friday!