I agree that getting in contact with a L isnt' a bad idea. I think trying to force yourself back into the home probably is. You're making a disaster out of a situation that hasn't happened (I'm just as guilty of this (Re: the dogs in my sitch)) but it doesn't hurt to have a game plan just in case your disaster scenario is true. So yeah, I agree with Thornton, a L is probably a good person to have in your corner.
M:26 H:32 T:8yrs ILYBNILWY/ "I'm not happy": 2/6/16 D-Day-discovered PA/EA: 2/10/16 Separated: 2/14/16 He's living with OW I moved to different state: 06/16 Currently: Trying to move forward
we actually had a lawyer friend sit down with us when I decided to move out 4 weeks ago. she said she wouldn't accuse me of abandonment in front of him as a witness. I told him today I wanted to move back in because I feel guilty about leaving my kids. Plus the fact I'm sleeping on a friends couch.he said he didn't see an issue legally, but warned me she's going to be super pissed. I really don't give a rats ass at this point if she gets pissed.
Me-LBH, 44 Spouse-WAW, 41 Married for 9 years S, 7 S, 5 BD - November 20th 2015
Kids have not been told anything except that dad is going to see a friend for awhile. SANDI can you please explain to me on how to DB in a in house separation. Or at least the guidelines per say. I thought i read somewhere that you said it's almost impossible.
Me-LBH, 44 Spouse-WAW, 41 Married for 9 years S, 7 S, 5 BD - November 20th 2015
we actually had a lawyer friend sit down with us when I decided to move out 4 weeks ago. she said she wouldn't accuse me of abandonment in front of him as a witness. I told him today I wanted to move back in because I feel guilty about leaving my kids. Plus the fact I'm sleeping on a friends couch.he said he didn't see an issue legally, but warned me she's going to be super pissed. I really don't give a rats ass at this point if she gets pissed.
Yep, you need to move back ASAP. Be ready for the crap she will deal you but you need to assert your rights.
Me-LBH, 48 Spouse-WW, 48 Married for 19 years Son, 12 BD #1 - November 1998 (EA 7 months after wedding) BD #2 - November 2015 (same XBF EA) WW filed D February 2016 WW moved out April 2016
I think you are doing what a lot of H's do, which is impulsive action. Give it another week before moving. Get legal facts on where you stand by not moving back, what she can or can't do to hurt you in D and child custody. Don't use the lawyer friend b/c he is a mutual friend. Get a lawyer who will work for your best outcome.
You left b/c you couldn't handle being under the same roof. If you return, do it with a purpose driven mindset. Know your true reason for returning, and the plan you will follow. I don't suggest you blindly move back, or out of compulsion.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Sandi. I totally agree things should not be done from impulse or emotions. I've thought this through for over a week and it's time to truly put my foot down. I'm going to do my best not to show anger. My wife needs to know that I'll no longer take her disrespect.
Me-LBH, 44 Spouse-WAW, 41 Married for 9 years S, 7 S, 5 BD - November 20th 2015
