Where will we go from here

[JulieH]

I think it's good that's you are waiting. Important not to make decisions when emotional. In fact, I would hold off on filing until absolutely necessary for your protection to see what transpires.

Your wife has issues. Your marriage had issues from the very beginning. It seems to have been established off of a lot of emotion and dysfunction. .

But, I do think your wife is acting on emotion right now. You are acting on emotion. She too is scared and she too is angry. I can imagine how fearful she must be knowing that her husband is a lawyer and has access to top lawyers. I know how fearful you must be thinking you might never have access to children again. The court system can be cruel and you are both waving it around like heavy ammunition. Very, very scary and volatile. I am sure you know better then I. My lawyer warned me that once you proceed through the courts things are never amicable. i cannot help but feel like this will turn into a nasty battle. For childrens sake, amicable is always preferred. Please, find a social worker. Maybe school guidance counselors can recommend someone.

Your situation reads like a power struggle and the kids are in the middle.

Did you ever ask her, what she thought would be best plan so that you can still have an active financial and emotional role in their lives? (Sadly, hearing that financial,offering might make her more responsive. But hey. It gets you negotiating )

You can say something like, "I do not agree with divorce but I have no choice and will have to accept this. But I would like to continue providing the children with financial and emotional support. What would be a way that I could do this for them, that you would be ok with?"

Let her have control when it comes to this. Hear her out. Listen to what she says. If things go well for her, she will probably see you as a non threatening advantage to her life.

I was just advised this by coach so I will apply it to your situation

When you do good you will feel good. Will a court battle make you feel good?

When you do bad you will feel bad. Will coming up with solution that makes things easy on the kids make you feel bad?

I think work on building a team right now before making a rash decision. Get advise from different lawyers, counselors, people that have experienced this.

I get that there is so much at stake right now and I get the legal implications for every delay.