Thank you rouky and broke.,,I am still not feeling great but hopefully slowly getting better. Did really light exercise and I was out of breath for a while so I am definatly thinking a walking pneumonia or secondary asthma.
Mutatio, I am going to try that. I have committed to a challenge of 5 min of meditation/ day. I was wondering what would be a good visualization to go with my breaths. (I kept resorting to climbing up 5 stairs and the down 5 stairs to coincide with my breaths...not very relaxing). I will try your mantra and see if it helps.
I often get consumed with the anger. I think, think, think of the ways I was wronged. The things I want to say to husband. The injustice of it all. I get mad at his mother because i feel she enabled it. I get mad at everything. And these thoughts and dialogues stay in me whenever I drive, or when I am doing something mindless.
Right now I am worried about husbands health though. I am sad that it has come to this. I feel like it is so fixable, but i know that he does not. And that leaves me with little options...move on or wait too we if he changes his mind. It's been 8 months and he has not though.
